Must be through some lack of kindness.
I've had two Summer Flings in my short existence.
The first was so dismally bad I considered killing myself.
The second has been so wonderfully pleasant that I feel like the last dregs of Broken Kate may have been karmic-ly flushed from my system like some delightful warm brew.
I'd forgotten what Happy-Just-'Cause felt like.
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Top Albums
If I'm doing movies I should definitely do albums. All my reasons as personal but it doesn't mean you shouldn't check them out anyway.
Amanda Palmer and the Grand Theft Orchestra: Theatre is Evil.
This formative album came at a formative time for me. The last year has not been hell, but it was unrelentingly bad. I mean the kind of year that starts off poorly, then you see Prince. Then the high wears off and a friend gets into a car accident leaving his partner, toddler and still baking baby alone. Then a close friend decides to tear you a new one for something trivial. Then you do something unknowingly but so reprehensible that the shame doesn't leave you for months but oh, does that anger fester at your fast declining reputation. And all the while, bubbling under every little up and down is a panic attack. Lurking. Waiting for things to get just that little bit worse. Theatre is Evil empathised with all of those emotions (with added bass!) but amongst the darkness is this certain level of hope, either conveyed in the lyrics or the music, that just lifts you up. It made me think of people I hadn't thought of in years, of their actions and mine, and I've got to be honest, it's gotten me over a few hurdles in this short time it's been out.
Stand out tracks: The Killing Type and Grown Man Cry.
HIM: Screamworks: Love in Theory and Practise.
This album for me is a return to happier times. I was a year behind in listening to this one. By the time I'd gotten to it I was running in my lunch breaks, it was summer and the sun was beating down on me as I beat down on the riverside track on the edge of town. It reminds me of summer rain, the positive changes I was making in my life, achieving my goals and a general happiness which for months just stayed with me. I was excited about life. My love of this album is also two fold as I'd just recently discovered my friend Lanny loved HIM too, so I gave her a copy of the album and for weeks we talked about the songs and the film clips. I miss Lanny, but we have phone dates.
Stand out tracks: Foreboding Sense of Impending Happiness and Love the Hardest Way.
Romeo + Juliet
This compilation came out in 1996, but as I was 10 I didn't get onto it until sometime later (I was still in the throes of pop idolisation, a trend my mother sorely misses). Once again, this was a formative album for me. This was my jumping off point into the Alternative Rock genre which I still passionately love today. In one collection we have The Butthole Surfers, Radiohead, Garbage and Everclear. You also have the drama, colour and pace of (what I deem) Baz Luhrman's best film backing up the sour desperation and empty unrelenting anger of the songs. Even just *listening* this soundtrack is made of stunning visuals as you re-imagine Luhrman's Manchua. Des'ree's Kissing You will always make me cry, not shed-a-tear cry but proper sob-openly and wholly. It's crushing and it breaks you.
Stand out tracks: I honestly can't pick just one, like a child I love this album in its entirety for how it makes me feel.
More to come.
Amanda Palmer and the Grand Theft Orchestra: Theatre is Evil.
This formative album came at a formative time for me. The last year has not been hell, but it was unrelentingly bad. I mean the kind of year that starts off poorly, then you see Prince. Then the high wears off and a friend gets into a car accident leaving his partner, toddler and still baking baby alone. Then a close friend decides to tear you a new one for something trivial. Then you do something unknowingly but so reprehensible that the shame doesn't leave you for months but oh, does that anger fester at your fast declining reputation. And all the while, bubbling under every little up and down is a panic attack. Lurking. Waiting for things to get just that little bit worse. Theatre is Evil empathised with all of those emotions (with added bass!) but amongst the darkness is this certain level of hope, either conveyed in the lyrics or the music, that just lifts you up. It made me think of people I hadn't thought of in years, of their actions and mine, and I've got to be honest, it's gotten me over a few hurdles in this short time it's been out.
Stand out tracks: The Killing Type and Grown Man Cry.
HIM: Screamworks: Love in Theory and Practise.
This album for me is a return to happier times. I was a year behind in listening to this one. By the time I'd gotten to it I was running in my lunch breaks, it was summer and the sun was beating down on me as I beat down on the riverside track on the edge of town. It reminds me of summer rain, the positive changes I was making in my life, achieving my goals and a general happiness which for months just stayed with me. I was excited about life. My love of this album is also two fold as I'd just recently discovered my friend Lanny loved HIM too, so I gave her a copy of the album and for weeks we talked about the songs and the film clips. I miss Lanny, but we have phone dates.
Stand out tracks: Foreboding Sense of Impending Happiness and Love the Hardest Way.
Romeo + Juliet
This compilation came out in 1996, but as I was 10 I didn't get onto it until sometime later (I was still in the throes of pop idolisation, a trend my mother sorely misses). Once again, this was a formative album for me. This was my jumping off point into the Alternative Rock genre which I still passionately love today. In one collection we have The Butthole Surfers, Radiohead, Garbage and Everclear. You also have the drama, colour and pace of (what I deem) Baz Luhrman's best film backing up the sour desperation and empty unrelenting anger of the songs. Even just *listening* this soundtrack is made of stunning visuals as you re-imagine Luhrman's Manchua. Des'ree's Kissing You will always make me cry, not shed-a-tear cry but proper sob-openly and wholly. It's crushing and it breaks you.
Stand out tracks: I honestly can't pick just one, like a child I love this album in its entirety for how it makes me feel.
More to come.
Why Don't You Talk To Me?
Why don't you talk to me?
I even flossed this evening.
Come say it to my face so we can leave this place. Why don't you talk to me?
So last years resolutions were the standard variations on the old staples: Lose Weight, Run Faster, Save Money. There was also the silent goal to Not Accidentally Kill Myself and the not so silent get everything in order to move to Melbourne. Well, what do you know? I survived my depression (but kept the increasingly awesome Panic Disorder)! I paid off my debts (but have $90 in my savings)! I completed a half marathon (but my sprint remains at a max of 14kmph for short spans)! I achieved my first goal weight (and maintained it for the year- without losing any more)!
I know, lofty heights right?
This year I've really thought it through: I've got the standard variations of the old staples: Run more half marathons, lay the ground work for a marathon, save to travel and become some kind of bendy yoga goddess. My silent goals are to get my life in some kind of order to have a child in the coming years.
Guys, this might be the year I start to grow up.
Sunday, August 5, 2012
Not Quite a Top Ten List
A friend of mine is watching a Top 100 Movies list, well, working her way through it. She has watched a few movies that she didn't really get, including a few of my favourites, but when asked for my opinion on WHY I liked them I found I couldn't really explain myself.
So anyway, it got me thinking of my favourite movies. Its a working list, obviously I haven't seen the movies that are yet to come out that will probably be up there for me (here's looking at you Looper- time travel AND Joseph Gordon-Levitt grows up to be Bruce Willis- hellooo000OOOOO). A lot of them will probably be very standard, but so what? I'm 25, I can't be expected to have watched everything... YET.
All this without spoilers.
Romantic Comedies: Shut up, everyone watches them.
Crazy, Stupid, Love: Clever, realistic (to a point) and no happy ending. I like me a romantic comedy that doesn't end the way the formula suggests. Two stand out scenes are the one where Ryan Gosling is seducing Emma Stone in his swanky bachelor pad and the OTHER one where Ryan Gosling and Steve Carrell are beating the shit out of each other when Kevin Bacon rocks up, and even though Ryan is getting the raw end of the deal from Steve, he still attacks Kevin Bacon. Love the solidarity, is what I'm saying. I enjoy a good bromance.
It Happened One Night: Every girl has one oldie timey (wibbly wobbly) movie that they love. Deal with it. Mine is It Happened One Night starring Clark Gable and Claudette Colbert, filmed five years before Gone with the Wind and frankly the better of the two. Peter and Ellie (respectively) play absolute arseholes who band together to get across America so Peter can get his story and Ellie can get away from her father. Stand out scene where Peter tries to hitch hike. Wildly hilarious.
When Harry Met Sally: Nora Ephron is a genius. Also, whether you've got one now or are waiting for the next one to come along, everyone has had that *really* close friend which has danced dangerously close to boyfriend/girlfriend line. I could live for some of those beautifully tense moments some days (read: I miss Jack). Plus, everyone knows Billy Crystal's speech at the end. If you don't cry you probably don't have a soul and/or are a Ginger. I still do the White Man Over Bite whenever I go out. So what I'm saying is the movie is mostly nostalgia.
Friends with Benefits: This is a really good romantic comedy, considering the formulaic bullshit that's been coming out of Hollywood lately. It's quick and witty without being contrived. Also, it's nice to see a movie that doesn't portray sex as being some kind of mystery and that women can have sex too (What's Your Number? Omgods, really? A woman spends the movie defining herself by her sexual partners and Chris Evans ploughs his way through half of New York. No Hollywood, NO). Plus, Justin Timberlake singing Criss Cross is pretty awesome.
Think-y Movies: I'm not bright, I don't pretend to be.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind: First of all, when I'm actually down to think, in a proper 'I can concentrate and don't need to think about things people are Pinning' mood, I love something that makes my brain run marathons. If you've got a complicated non linear plot I AM YOUR GIRL. Provided I'm not hung over/tired/agitated. Enter the Spotless Mind. The main story is sweet and sad, the sub story is just sad and you think of the moral implications of the whole thing for days afterwards. I also have a major soft spot of Jim Carrey. He is underrated as an Actor. I don't have a favourite scene, I love the sheer mechanics of putting that story together, and then the ethics it involves. Charlie Kaufman is my idea of genius.
Party Monsters: Made in 2003 but set in the post Warhol New York club scene, it's the true (true-ish) story of Michael Alig who killed his dealer Angel*. Like the above I was thinking about this movie for weeks. I loved the cadence of the language, I loved the colour and the costumes, I loved the humour of these two men who constantly and dangerously have to out do each other. Of course, the film is also meta, as its told by both Michael Alig and James St. James, and then there is the level of horror at what these kids do to each other and themselves. Stand out scene is a rather touching moment between James St. James and Michael dancing in Michael's living room.
*Not a spoiler as it has been documented on talk shows, this movie, a mockumentary and a book.
Womb: This movie is an ethical mind fuck. If you aren't really into it it can be slow, but sit down and watch the whole thing without distractions, because I can't think of a single scene that doesn't build towards the finale. I can't describe it any further, but the very last scene will shock you and have you looking back on all the other scenes in a new light. A new disturbing light.
Musicals: Its not really fun unless you can dance to it.
Interstella 5555: I have no other way of really describing it, so musical it is. I'm also a little bit biased as Daft Punk's Discovery is one of my favourite albums and I've already got so many memories associated with it. What I loved was that there was no talking, at all, through out the entire movie, yet so much meaning and emotion was conveyed CLEARLY. Guys, if you're more or less making a silent movie this is how. I even cried when *redacted because spoiler*. Basically, a really kick arse alien band are kidnapped by an evil human and a fellow alien follows them to earth where the exact opposite of hilarity/Unrequited love ensues.
It's also nice to have a memory for Digital Love that doesn't involve this guy I used go to Uni with.
Action: I'm sorry in advance for the eventual Bruce Willis-ness.
Men in Black: So I was fairly young when it came out, but Will Smith was a bit of a champion growing up. Plus, this movie has some great one liners, buddy romance and visual gags. I love how Will Smith's initial test to join the MIB was a common sense test, I love Will Smith's opening line "N.Y.P.D. means KNOCK YO PUNKASS DOWN".
That's all I've got for now, because I'm tired and hung over, and thinking about things only made that worse, but I will continue to add to this.
So anyway, it got me thinking of my favourite movies. Its a working list, obviously I haven't seen the movies that are yet to come out that will probably be up there for me (here's looking at you Looper- time travel AND Joseph Gordon-Levitt grows up to be Bruce Willis- hellooo000OOOOO). A lot of them will probably be very standard, but so what? I'm 25, I can't be expected to have watched everything... YET.
All this without spoilers.
Romantic Comedies: Shut up, everyone watches them.
Crazy, Stupid, Love: Clever, realistic (to a point) and no happy ending. I like me a romantic comedy that doesn't end the way the formula suggests. Two stand out scenes are the one where Ryan Gosling is seducing Emma Stone in his swanky bachelor pad and the OTHER one where Ryan Gosling and Steve Carrell are beating the shit out of each other when Kevin Bacon rocks up, and even though Ryan is getting the raw end of the deal from Steve, he still attacks Kevin Bacon. Love the solidarity, is what I'm saying. I enjoy a good bromance.
It Happened One Night: Every girl has one oldie timey (wibbly wobbly) movie that they love. Deal with it. Mine is It Happened One Night starring Clark Gable and Claudette Colbert, filmed five years before Gone with the Wind and frankly the better of the two. Peter and Ellie (respectively) play absolute arseholes who band together to get across America so Peter can get his story and Ellie can get away from her father. Stand out scene where Peter tries to hitch hike. Wildly hilarious.
When Harry Met Sally: Nora Ephron is a genius. Also, whether you've got one now or are waiting for the next one to come along, everyone has had that *really* close friend which has danced dangerously close to boyfriend/girlfriend line. I could live for some of those beautifully tense moments some days (read: I miss Jack). Plus, everyone knows Billy Crystal's speech at the end. If you don't cry you probably don't have a soul and/or are a Ginger. I still do the White Man Over Bite whenever I go out. So what I'm saying is the movie is mostly nostalgia.
Friends with Benefits: This is a really good romantic comedy, considering the formulaic bullshit that's been coming out of Hollywood lately. It's quick and witty without being contrived. Also, it's nice to see a movie that doesn't portray sex as being some kind of mystery and that women can have sex too (What's Your Number? Omgods, really? A woman spends the movie defining herself by her sexual partners and Chris Evans ploughs his way through half of New York. No Hollywood, NO). Plus, Justin Timberlake singing Criss Cross is pretty awesome.
Think-y Movies: I'm not bright, I don't pretend to be.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind: First of all, when I'm actually down to think, in a proper 'I can concentrate and don't need to think about things people are Pinning' mood, I love something that makes my brain run marathons. If you've got a complicated non linear plot I AM YOUR GIRL. Provided I'm not hung over/tired/agitated. Enter the Spotless Mind. The main story is sweet and sad, the sub story is just sad and you think of the moral implications of the whole thing for days afterwards. I also have a major soft spot of Jim Carrey. He is underrated as an Actor. I don't have a favourite scene, I love the sheer mechanics of putting that story together, and then the ethics it involves. Charlie Kaufman is my idea of genius.
Party Monsters: Made in 2003 but set in the post Warhol New York club scene, it's the true (true-ish) story of Michael Alig who killed his dealer Angel*. Like the above I was thinking about this movie for weeks. I loved the cadence of the language, I loved the colour and the costumes, I loved the humour of these two men who constantly and dangerously have to out do each other. Of course, the film is also meta, as its told by both Michael Alig and James St. James, and then there is the level of horror at what these kids do to each other and themselves. Stand out scene is a rather touching moment between James St. James and Michael dancing in Michael's living room.
*Not a spoiler as it has been documented on talk shows, this movie, a mockumentary and a book.
Womb: This movie is an ethical mind fuck. If you aren't really into it it can be slow, but sit down and watch the whole thing without distractions, because I can't think of a single scene that doesn't build towards the finale. I can't describe it any further, but the very last scene will shock you and have you looking back on all the other scenes in a new light. A new disturbing light.
Musicals: Its not really fun unless you can dance to it.
Interstella 5555: I have no other way of really describing it, so musical it is. I'm also a little bit biased as Daft Punk's Discovery is one of my favourite albums and I've already got so many memories associated with it. What I loved was that there was no talking, at all, through out the entire movie, yet so much meaning and emotion was conveyed CLEARLY. Guys, if you're more or less making a silent movie this is how. I even cried when *redacted because spoiler*. Basically, a really kick arse alien band are kidnapped by an evil human and a fellow alien follows them to earth where the exact opposite of hilarity/Unrequited love ensues.
It's also nice to have a memory for Digital Love that doesn't involve this guy I used go to Uni with.
Action: I'm sorry in advance for the eventual Bruce Willis-ness.
Men in Black: So I was fairly young when it came out, but Will Smith was a bit of a champion growing up. Plus, this movie has some great one liners, buddy romance and visual gags. I love how Will Smith's initial test to join the MIB was a common sense test, I love Will Smith's opening line "N.Y.P.D. means KNOCK YO PUNKASS DOWN".
That's all I've got for now, because I'm tired and hung over, and thinking about things only made that worse, but I will continue to add to this.
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Wham Bam Thank you Maam!
Suffragette city!
I know why I'm lonely. I was all happy, knitting, having midnight dance parties to the Backstreet Boys and Nicki Minaj and Slayer, rewatching EVERY episode of Buffy when BAM. A man showed a moment's worth of notice my way and NOW I'M LONELY. Which is stupid. Because I wasn't the weekend before.
I went to breakfast with some old work mates of mine, during which one of them proudly detailed how her son proposed to his girlfriend and showed us a picture of the huge BESPOKE (no idea what it means, but it sounds impressive). I exclaimed (bitterly, as I am wont to do) "Look at all these happy people, being happy" to which my friend replied, "It's okay, I'm not happy, neither is my daughter." Our friend has been happily married for the last twenty years and was told she didn't count.
I came home, had a bath, ate some truly crap food and when my listlessness couldn't be resolved by that new show Girls or a hot bath and depressing music I realised why I was lonely. And that I am stupid. Once again, I had the same experience- I actually remember twice now telling a friend that I didn't experience any weak knees or emotional lady boner. Chemistry, if you will.
So why the lonely?
Sunday, July 8, 2012
I Gotta Run, Gotta Run.
Gotta run today.
Kate's Top 6 Tips to Enjoying Running.
1. Form. It's not going to be fun if you run like Phoebe Buffay through Central Park- not that she didn't look like she was having fun, but no one likes overexerting themselves/getting injured. So keep good posture. Remember in Yoga when the instructor says to straighten your torso and pretend there is a string in the top of your head that you are hanging from to align your spine? Do that. Have your chin pointed in a comfortable 'up' position, your shoulders back, your chest open and your hips tilted in towards your spine. I'm not saying do it the whole time. You *are* going to get exhausted, your posture will fail. Just try to remember and fix it when it happens. You'll get farther.
2. Make it a game. I like to pretend I'm the Terminator and I'm hunting down every person in front of me, annihilating them as I pass them and targeting a new victim. When my posture is failing I pretend I'm a Transforming as I put each part of me back into place. I increase my lung capacity to rapping along with Puff Daddy (he was Daddy back in my day). There are ways to make it fun even on the days the endorphins aren't kicking in when they should.
3. Consistency. Keep going. No one has a 100% good runs. Some days you won't be able to make it past 3kms. Just remember those other days when you made it to 10kms, or ran no stop up hill for half an hour. Because for every bad run you'll have a least a weeks worth of good runs.
4. Keep a record. Sure, when you're starting out and can barely make that first kilometre keeping a record seems pointless, but it's fascinating to see how far you've come. I started running on August 29th 2011 when a friend of mine (who quit running with me after a week) and couldn't even manage a kilometre. My Runner-versary is just around the corner. I had to do intervals just to get the first one under my belt, but I kept going. Today I can bust out the spare 5-6kms I keep in my back pocket three times a week, and when I really put my mind to it I can bust out up to 12 non stop and am slowly working on my first half marathon. I am now running at 10.1kmph. I'm stoked. You can keep your own records, or you can download applications that do it for you (I can really recommend Kinetic GPS). If you are running to lose weight weigh yourself daily (Weightbot is another good app) and I can full recommend keeping your chest, waist and hips measurements (which comes in handy when you want to start ordering AUHmazing dresses online).
5. Eat well. If you don't put the fuel in you are not going to get the distance. End of Story.
6. Don't limit yourself to just running. Yes- it burns a buttload of fat. Yes it builds muscle, but it is not the be all and end all. You can't have cake every day and still enjoy cake, and no matter how many different tracks you run you do eventually get bored. I switched my running up to involve a weights routine. The weights I lift strengthen my legs and ensure I can make distances. The work I do on my torso and back cushion my spine for the impact of running. Also, denser bones, LADIES.
Kate's Top 6 Tips to Enjoying Running.
1. Form. It's not going to be fun if you run like Phoebe Buffay through Central Park- not that she didn't look like she was having fun, but no one likes overexerting themselves/getting injured. So keep good posture. Remember in Yoga when the instructor says to straighten your torso and pretend there is a string in the top of your head that you are hanging from to align your spine? Do that. Have your chin pointed in a comfortable 'up' position, your shoulders back, your chest open and your hips tilted in towards your spine. I'm not saying do it the whole time. You *are* going to get exhausted, your posture will fail. Just try to remember and fix it when it happens. You'll get farther.
2. Make it a game. I like to pretend I'm the Terminator and I'm hunting down every person in front of me, annihilating them as I pass them and targeting a new victim. When my posture is failing I pretend I'm a Transforming as I put each part of me back into place. I increase my lung capacity to rapping along with Puff Daddy (he was Daddy back in my day). There are ways to make it fun even on the days the endorphins aren't kicking in when they should.
3. Consistency. Keep going. No one has a 100% good runs. Some days you won't be able to make it past 3kms. Just remember those other days when you made it to 10kms, or ran no stop up hill for half an hour. Because for every bad run you'll have a least a weeks worth of good runs.
4. Keep a record. Sure, when you're starting out and can barely make that first kilometre keeping a record seems pointless, but it's fascinating to see how far you've come. I started running on August 29th 2011 when a friend of mine (who quit running with me after a week) and couldn't even manage a kilometre. My Runner-versary is just around the corner. I had to do intervals just to get the first one under my belt, but I kept going. Today I can bust out the spare 5-6kms I keep in my back pocket three times a week, and when I really put my mind to it I can bust out up to 12 non stop and am slowly working on my first half marathon. I am now running at 10.1kmph. I'm stoked. You can keep your own records, or you can download applications that do it for you (I can really recommend Kinetic GPS). If you are running to lose weight weigh yourself daily (Weightbot is another good app) and I can full recommend keeping your chest, waist and hips measurements (which comes in handy when you want to start ordering AUHmazing dresses online).
5. Eat well. If you don't put the fuel in you are not going to get the distance. End of Story.
6. Don't limit yourself to just running. Yes- it burns a buttload of fat. Yes it builds muscle, but it is not the be all and end all. You can't have cake every day and still enjoy cake, and no matter how many different tracks you run you do eventually get bored. I switched my running up to involve a weights routine. The weights I lift strengthen my legs and ensure I can make distances. The work I do on my torso and back cushion my spine for the impact of running. Also, denser bones, LADIES.
Monday, April 2, 2012
I'm Not Your Lover
I'm not your friend, I am something that you'll never comprehend.
I've been thinking about sex a lot lately. Mainly because I recently had some on a continual basis which then ended. Mainly because everyone around me is suddenly getting some. Mainly because, fuck it, I just enjoy sex.
I think it's wonderful. It's a great way to boost yours and your partner's self esteem. It's a great way of getting to know someone, and it's simply wonderful to balance out your moods and make sure you go to bed exhausted. It can make you feel closer to the person you are having it with. It can be liberating. Frankly it's just thoroughly enjoyable. Even if you have to do it to yourself.
I didn't enjoy sex when I first started. Like most people I was young and rushed the whole experience. I just wanted it over and done with so I could get to enjoying it. I was realistic, I knew I wasn't going to get what I wanted out of the first few goes. Hell, I didn't even know what I wanted, let alone how to direct someone into doing it for me. My partner was also young and ill experienced. Didn't stop him from trying *bless* but unfortunately I was also ill experienced- in young men's egos. I'll admit I wasn't as kind and nurturing as I could have been, which resulted in a lack lustre pursuit of the female orgasm. He got there though. The relationship did not.
Confidence came with age. I grew up a little bit, lost my figure (I became offensively large, but that's another story) but some how also more confident in bed. I know every woman in a teenage girl's life tells her confidence comes with age, that once hormones stop mutating your body and settles into some form of breasts and hips that you suddenly come to appreciate it, and that every teenage girl thinks it's a joke. I'm serious, at some stage it just happens. You stop focusing on your wobbly parts and how they are moving in time to your thrusts and you JUST. DON'T. CARE.
I was at my largest with my last partner. It didn't stop me... Although I'll admit I always took his glasses off under the pretense I didn't want them to get broken in the mix. I realised during this time that my sexuality had changed again. In my life (thus far) I'd gone from awkward and unsatisfied teenager, to unconfident and shy 20 something, to sexually confident woman. I had no fear saying exactly what I wanted and how, and more importantly, enjoyed sex for what it is: An educational experience.
Personally, sex should be seen as an opportunity to learn. It doesn't have to be a new move or every session, but you need to be open to learning. I learnt things about him that I found I enjoyed as well. I learnt new things about myself. It helped that I'd recently started working out a lot, as I'd become more flexible but also more energetic.
So now I'm happy with my sexuality. I have a fairly good idea of what I like and what interests me, as well as things I'd like to try in the future. Now to find someone/s to do it with.
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